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Megan and I recently went prayer walking in Central City with our church here in New Orleans. I listened to three men talk about when and how they got high. Kids were wondering everywhere. The level of poverty was catastrophic. "Thou shalt not kill" signs were in home windows. Homes were still destroyed from hurricane Katrina. People walked by carrying beer and liquor at 10:30 in the morning. It was a very dark place. There was no pride and no hope. You found yourself wondering, "what could I possibly do for these people." Amidst all of this, not one person or group of people refused prayer. We prayed with probably 50 people. They were so desperate for anything. They had lost everything. But more then that they lost hope. Erwin McManus wrote, "When you lack hope, you feel powerless to change anything and certain that nothing will change. When you have hope, you are able to see the beauty and potential of every circumstance." These people don't need money, or food or any material thing. What they need more than anything is hope.
The God is trying to deal with one of my most apparent character flaws. I am extremely judgemental. I hate it. It drives me crazy. I notice it more and more everyday. It reveals how broken, damaged and foolish I am. Last night I had a long talk with Megan about how it needs to be destroyed. I like that word destroyed. Its a good way of describing how God wants to eliminate your character flaws. Anyway, I work at a place were there is this bubble of wealthy people who think they don't need anything, and deserve everything, and that really brings out my judgemental attitude. But this is a place in which if I am willing God can really do some awesome things for my character and teach me how to love these people as he does. Judgement is not my job. A critical spirit is not healthy. It fuels negativity and puts off a very "I am better than you" attitude. Followers of Christ have been known for this for far too long and Jesus was never known for this. Its time for a change. Judgement coming from me is not right, its not loving and its not the way Jesus wants me to be. This process of destroying my judgemental attitude is going to be very painful, difficult and ugly. It will expose me for a lot of who I can be. But in the end it will be so freeing and rewarding as the God will renew my mind and heart and make it more like his. The pain starts today.
Wisdom can be complicated. But if you try to simplify it, it is like connecting the dots. Understanding your choices and how they affect each other. They all have a good outcome or a bad one. Its a lot like cause and effect. We are all at a specific place and time right now and our past choices have led us to this place. Whether its a good place or a bad place, choices were made and they were all connected over time that led you to this place. The reality is that the future is predictable by the choices we make today. So the best way for me to live wisely is to continue to give my fears to God so that I can freely make good and wise choices that are based on His voice. In other words, If you love God with all your heart, then everything you do will be what he wants you to do, and ultimately, the wise thing to do.
I have been learning about wisdom lately. As in like the last few days. Proverbs says that "fear of the Lord is the foundation of knowledge." When I think of fear it is usually a negative thought. But I think when you give your fears to God it enables you to live a life that is more free. Fear is based on what is unknown right? Like the things that you can't control. If I focus my fear on God, what I am saying is that God I am going to trust you for all things that I am afraid of so that my freedom will only be limited to what his voice tells me to do. And I would have to say that that is the ultimate life of freedom, and especially wisdom. Since the God is wise I would have to say that it is safe to assume that doing what he says is wise. I don't know if this makes sense or not.
